Doggles!
Doggles! Goggles for dogs!

Halloween - Doggie Style
Pet costumes!

Copycat
Ooh! I wanna steal that poll thing from that Ahren dude! (Link from Wendy's blog)

Dead Phone
As my nifty cell phone crapped out on me, I will be needing everybody's phone numbers again. Please e-mail them to me. Thanks!

Some unsolicited advice to all: make back-ups of your phone list and e-mail list. An ounce of prevention ...

Doggie Girl's Tainted Name - Part 2
So I just did a Google search of Doggie Girl and guess what! All porn sites.

Doggie Girl's Tainted Name
I started this blog site on Friday. I picked my log-in name because of my unique job taming herds of dogs all day every day. Friday night Brian had HBO on and the show Real Sex came on. This episode was about an amateur porn festival. The award for funniest homemade adult film went to this creepy guy from Boston (do you know him Wendy?) who dressed up as a clown and "accidentally" ended up at Doggie Girl's apartment. Doggie Girl was an artist (painter) who was a girl with a papier-mache dog mask complete w/ floppy ears and a t-shirt that read Doggie Girl. She didn't speak, only panted, barked and yipped. I am not her.

Losing My F-in Mind
I just 2 minutes ago decided I urgently needed to post to my blog because I had something important and entertaining to say. Now that I have logged in I have absolutely no idea what I had to say. I can't remember. My brain is seriously faulty. WTF.

Comments!
I added a comments link! Yay! Now I'm not just talking to myself!

Instant Messenger
Hey, you guys all have to let me know your AOL Instant Messenger buddy names! If you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine. ;) E-mail me.

Where We Met
It was love at first drench. Heroes is the place where I threw a drink on my sweetie the first night I met him. He, of course, returned the favor immediately.

No Offense
Just to clarify, I am not making light of other people's children's challenges. I am mocking our own mental deficiencies. It's okay to make fun of a made-up child! He's not real!!!

I HATE BEYONCE!!!
Beyonce irks me b/c she is WAY too in love with herself/appearance. Check out one of her classic "are you lookin' at it?" poses. I dubbed it that. She also has an "are you lookin' at it?" dance. She wants to make sure you check out her "bootylicious" ass. She's a big fan of using a big fan, too. For that sexy wind-blown look. Another "are you lookin' at it?" shot. Just ridiculous.

Yay!
Yay! Wendy put me on her page already! BTW, you can skip the mushy post below and go straight to the funny stuff if that's more your style. ;)

Why I Love Brian
We connected so amazingly. We are both crazy and retarded in the same ways and are lucky to have found each other because we have special and unique mental oddities. We find the same demented stuff funny (see below) and find ourselves disabled by laughter on a regular basis. When I don't ruin it by being spoiled and selfish, we can spend infinite amounts of time together and still want more. It's almost like a crack addiction. But it doesn't make me as ugly. In addition to having a brain that is intelligent and warped like mine, he knows a lot of stuff -- i think they call that being worldly. He's super kind and sweet and pretty attentive, though I'm working on training him better ;). (Just a little joke in reference to my job involving training dogs.) We enjoy each other's company no matter what we're doing and have so much fun together. He so cute and he's the sweetiest sweetie of all!

Side note: our child would wear a helmet and bib and ride the short bus to school. He'd have a fancy helmet for picture day.

Mr. Pickles
I recently temporarily took in a fat pug named Winston, although my boyfriend decided to rename him Mr. Pickles because my boyfriend is retarded. Winston/Mr. Pickles does two things: snarfles and walks in clockwise circles. It may not sound like it, but he is the best dog ever (ties with Klondyke for that title). He is always happy, completely easy-going, always entertaining, so ugly he's cute, and just so freakin' loveable. Too bad he's gross and stinky and noisy (snores in addition to snarflin) and hairy.

I Suck
I suck at vacations. I'm really bad at them. Last week I took one. It was the worst week I've had in a long time. I broke my camera phone, Brian's car broke, I broke the shower, the hurricane broke our tree and our power and made my car smell like rotten death (roof leaks). Power stayed broken for 6 days. Hurricane ruined trip to beach. and trip to Harpers Ferry. Sleeping too much ruined other day-trips. Drinking ruined Brian and I liking each other some of the time. Being dirt poor ruined a lot of potentially fun ideas. I am glad I'm back at work being deafened by obnoxious barking and being bit and scratched and battered by monster dogs.

On an interesting note, I could be bequeathed a boxer. If Klondyke's owners die, I may get said dog along with a trust fund to pay for his daycare and vet expenses. Now I just have to figure out how to kill them both and make it look like an accident ...